A little Older
Maybe a bit wiser, maybe with a few regrets over the last year, and happy to start anew.
I feel the sadness though, the longing for change or simply only the actualization of all my hopes and dreams. I have a vision and an idea, a feeling of what things should be. I'm scared of missing out on the passions and treasures that could be mine if only I reach out a little farther. I'm scared of pushing myself too hard for fear of breaking, delicate and emotional to the point of ridiculous. I look at what I have now and take stock of mediocrity, a disappointment so vast that I should be forced to change in hopes of finding my true happiness.
I fight back tears thinking of the things I give give up or pass by to please others, or for indulging in a moment just because it's there. Fighting against true feelings and pushing away regret to just experience the unknown that life has to offer. Am I with him because I truly do like hime? Or am I with him because he is here and willing to be with me. We laugh and talk about the big and little things and dance and love, but how deeply does this go? I question it too much and not enough, I let life happen without taking control and leaping for opportunities to help reach a goal not too far off. Far enough though.
If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with. And once you do, swallow your bitterness and drink in your endless tears. I'm floating in an ocean without a sign of where I'm heading, the waves gently rock me as I peer in all directions and realize any way could be the right way, I can make it so. All I need to do is decide to go along with it. But, still the fear grips me and I am scared to admit he is not the one I love, only the one I am with.
So we will drift here for a moment longer and see if the wave will carry us on in the right direction and I will reach farther for the opportunities that come my way. Drifting and knowing someday soon the stars will shine clear and I will be guided by an invisible hand to the one that is meant for me and a thousand years of searching through past lives and infinite distance will come to a happy and quiet end.
He's the one for now, someone to share this patch of sun with and dream together of a life less ordinary.
I feel the sadness though, the longing for change or simply only the actualization of all my hopes and dreams. I have a vision and an idea, a feeling of what things should be. I'm scared of missing out on the passions and treasures that could be mine if only I reach out a little farther. I'm scared of pushing myself too hard for fear of breaking, delicate and emotional to the point of ridiculous. I look at what I have now and take stock of mediocrity, a disappointment so vast that I should be forced to change in hopes of finding my true happiness.
I fight back tears thinking of the things I give give up or pass by to please others, or for indulging in a moment just because it's there. Fighting against true feelings and pushing away regret to just experience the unknown that life has to offer. Am I with him because I truly do like hime? Or am I with him because he is here and willing to be with me. We laugh and talk about the big and little things and dance and love, but how deeply does this go? I question it too much and not enough, I let life happen without taking control and leaping for opportunities to help reach a goal not too far off. Far enough though.
If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with. And once you do, swallow your bitterness and drink in your endless tears. I'm floating in an ocean without a sign of where I'm heading, the waves gently rock me as I peer in all directions and realize any way could be the right way, I can make it so. All I need to do is decide to go along with it. But, still the fear grips me and I am scared to admit he is not the one I love, only the one I am with.
So we will drift here for a moment longer and see if the wave will carry us on in the right direction and I will reach farther for the opportunities that come my way. Drifting and knowing someday soon the stars will shine clear and I will be guided by an invisible hand to the one that is meant for me and a thousand years of searching through past lives and infinite distance will come to a happy and quiet end.
He's the one for now, someone to share this patch of sun with and dream together of a life less ordinary.
posted by Sweet Sara at
2:07 PM
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